The Reason You Procastinate
When you criticize yourself for procrastinating, you’re more likely to procrastinate again and again and again.
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It’s a cruel cycle. You procrastinate, judge yourself, and still never accomplish anything.
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It’s the worst. It doesn’t feel good, yet the cycle continues because you think you need to, “get your shit together” and “stop being lazy.”
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That’s the problem though. Procrastination has less to do with willpower, and has more to do with your emotions.
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Procrastination is a coping-mechanism. You’re procrastinating as a way to escape from a task you don’t feel like doing.
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So first, remind yourself you don’t need to feel like doing something in order to do it. Sometimes you have to do shit you don’t like.
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The other part—the most important part—to breaking the cycle is this...
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You have an inner child. That inner child is throwing a tantrum right now, pouting in the corner, repeating, “I DON’T WANNA TO DO IT. I DON’T WANNA DO MY CHORES. AND I’M NOT GUNNA DO IT.”
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When you punish a child for misbehaving, usually 99% of the time, they act out. They’re testing you, they want to know you still love them regardless.
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This is why you continuously procrastinate—that inner child wants to know you still love them—yet, every time you procrastinate, you criticize instead. And just like that, you procrastinate again.
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This is where self-forgiveness and choices come in.
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Once a child discovers their autonomy, they retaliate. They avoid things they’re told to do, because they know they don’t have to do anything at all. This is why the choice method works.
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And that’s what you need to do with you. A conversation can look like this:
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“You can do this now and get it done OR not do it all. I won’t shame you either way, I’ll love you and forgive you irrespective of everything that gets left undone. However, if you don’t do it, there are consequences to your actions and eventually you’ll have to do it. Which choice will make your future self most proud and relieved?”
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The forgives part is imperative, as procrastination thrives off criticism. And adding in the consideration of your future self will most likely push you in the direction you truly desire.